I remember when I was 19 and I fell in love for the first time or maybe it was what I thought. I remember back then I watch tv shows like Sex and the City and all those types of programs where you said or gave their point of view on relationships. Only from the point of 4 New yorkers women and I remember those shows inspired my behavior of independent woman and how to understand the opposite sex. And if I wanted to take the initiative I could do it without any problem and you know I think it is not a general rule and it can work for some people , but not exactly for me.
Because it can sound super caveman and believe me I am neither sexist nor feminist, I just think it’s part of human nature, and the nature of man to know they are the ones who take the initiative, they are the “hunters “(if it sounds super prehistoric, but it is), which it does not necessarily mean that they are the ones who choose us in this game of seduction, because we have to learn to play in our favor too. Throw away Walt Disney and his fairy tales and I don’t mean in the sense that there is no perfect person for you, because I believe there is, but in terms that sometimes we idealize the wrong person . We really imagine a fairy tale, where there’s only sand castles. I think we idealizing them, but we also as women we think they think like us. They give us mixed signals, but they really love us, we actually want that love-hate game even in a friend relationship, because it can be sexy, and at the end, just like it happens in Hollywood films he we really want, even that game love-hate relationship between friends can be sexy because at the end he will be with you. But you know something that kind of behavior hurt us and we don’t see what is obvious. There are exceptions of course, I have a friend who had his happy ending with her husband ex casual date and now are very happy. However, to think that it will always be like that do not lead you to make you feel good about yourself.
A few weeks ago I was reading the book “He is not that into you”. I had no idea there was the book. I had seen the movie, and I loved the book because it has very clear examples of how women got off our standards and we deceive ourselves and really thought that the person we are dating or that “best” friend we liked really wants to be with us just he is afraid to ruin the friendship, or like we are very far to have something when the real reason is he does not want to be with you, simple, cold fact (maybe it’s difficult to understand for our part emotional as women, but it is how it is). At the end like men and women we are really different. Tony Robbins himself said in a video “ while women expect us the decipher them when they told us something, we actually say what we fucking mean. So if the person you’re dating, or best friend, or even your boyfriend, lover or whatever is giving you mixed signals, they are not mixed signals, it’s more tan clear you have to turn the page.